
Have you ever found yourself passionately explaining something to someone, only to realise they are as committed to misunderstanding you as a police traffic warden is to collecting “something small”? If you haven’t, congratulations—your village witches are sleeping on the job.
But for the rest of us, let’s talk about how to recognise when a conversation has shifted from a healthy discussion to a completely useless debate.
Stage 1: The Opening Statements – Hopeful Beginnings You start the conversation full of hope, like a fresh university graduate at their first job interview. Maybe you think, “This one, I can explain. They will see reason.” You put on your best serious face, adjust your voice to sound intelligent, and begin your argument like a well-prepared lawyer in front of Judge Abena Manu.
But my brother, my sister, did you check if the other person is even interested in reasoning?
Stage 2: The Red Flags – When You Should Have Stopped Talking This is where things start getting suspicious. You notice the person you are talking to is not really listening. Instead, they are nodding aggressively, waiting for their turn to speak, or even worse—laughing like a church elder who has just seen the offertery bowl filled with collections.
Here are the red flags that tell you to stop talking and walk away:
* They Interrupt You to Talk About Something Else
* You: “The economy is struggling because of inflation…”
* Them: “Ah! But have you seen Kwame’s new car? Ei, the way some people have money!”
* They Keep Repeating the Same Point Even After You’ve Debunked It
* You: “Actually, the Earth is round.”
* Them: “No, my friend, the Earth is flat. Haven’t you seen the horizon?”
* You: “Science has proven…”
* Them: “My uncle in the village says otherwise, and he’s never been wrong!”
* They Start Quoting Their ‘Uncle in America’ or ‘A WhatsApp Forward’ as Evidence
* You: “Vaccines are safe and effective.”
* Them: “Hmm, my uncle in America said Bill Gates is putting microchips inside!”
This is your cue. The spirits of your ancestors are whispering, “My child, leave this place.”
Stage 3: The Final Straw – When You Must Flee Like a JSS Student Caught Eating in Class At this point, you are no longer debating; you are engaging in spiritual warfare. The person has refused to see reason. In fact, the more facts you present, the more their confidence grows, like a politician promising to fix dumsor before elections.
Then it happens—the moment you know you should have kept quiet from the start:
* They Bring in Religion
* You: “Climate change is real.”
* Them: “Hmm, my pastor says it’s just the signs of the end times.”
* You: Sigh.
* They Resort to Insults
* You: “Corruption is bad for the country.”
* Them: “You that you don’t even have a car, you want to talk about corruption?”
Ah! At this point, my brother, just walk away. Let peace be your portion.
Stage 4: The Escape Plan – How to Leave Without Stress If you ever find yourself in one of these useless debates, use one of these escape plans:
* Pretend to Get a Phone Call
* “Oh! Hello? Yes, yes. I’m on my way now. Emergency! I have to go!”
* Then walk away quickly before they realize your phone never rang.
* Agree with Them Dramatically
* “You know what? You are right! I have been blind all my life. Thank you for opening my eyes!”
* Then leave before they suspect sarcasm.
* Start Speaking in Tongues
* “Raba shandara bazooka! Holy Ghost fire!”
* This will confuse them long enough for you to disappear.
Conclusion – Preserve Your Peace Not every argument deserves your energy. If someone is determined to argue like a market woman defending her overpriced tomatoes, just walk away. Your peace of mind is more important than proving a point to someone who has decided that logic is not their portion in this life.
The next time someone tries to engage you in a pointless debate, remember these wise words: “My brother, just walk away.”
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